Welcome to Holland!

Most mom's would get excited when they see a crowded playground. They see it as a great opportunity for their kids to mingle, make new friends, and feel relieved they don't have to be the one running up and down and all around. But when I pull up to a park and see other families running about it makes me cringe. I've told my kids that we're going to the park so there's appsolutely no turning back. So as I'm unbuckling them from there seatbelts I'm mentally preparing myself for an hour of "I'm sorry's" and "Oh, excuse him's" and "My son has autism so thats why.....". Like today- I wanted to take advantage of the nice weather so we set off. We pull up to the large playground and it's empty. Perfect! I came at just the right time. We're only 5 minutes into it and here comes a family of two boys (apprx. ages 6 and 8). Jace always gets sooooo excited when he sees other kids (especially strangers) so of coarse they get a hug and kiss from him. "Dude, your crazy", was the response from the older boy. A few minutes later I hear the other one say to him "I can't understand anything you're saying". While only a few minutes later another family comes with a boy and a girl (again, about 6 and 8) who get the same greating from Jace. The girl runs back to her mom and says, "Mom, that boy just hugged me and he doesn't even know me". Meanwhile Jace is in absolute heaven chasing these kids around but they countinue to make comments with an underliying tone of him being "weird". So even though Jace is completely innocent with what is being said towards him, my heart is just breaking. If only those kids knew how special Jace is they would be welcoming those hugs with open arms. I pray that he will never know how different he is from the other kids. I love this story and I realize it can be related to many things in our life, regardless if we have a child with special needs.

Welcome to Holland
byEmily Perl Kingsley
I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability – to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It’s like this…When you’re going to have a baby, it’s like planning a fabulous vacation trip – to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It’s all very exciting.After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, “Welcome to Holland.”“Holland?!?” you say. “What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I’m supposed to be in Italy. All my life I’ve dreamed of going to Italy.”But there’s been a change in the flight plan. They’ve landed in Holland and there you must stay.The important thing is that they haven’t taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It’s just a different place.So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met. It’s just a different place. It’s slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you’ve been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around… and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills… and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy… and they’re all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say, “Yes, that’s where I was supposed to go. That’s what I had planned.”And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away… because the loss of that dream is a very, very significant loss.But… if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn’t get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things… about Holland.

Life is not easy no matter what our situations are and we are going to have many "cringing" moments with Jace, but honestly I feel so lucky to have him. Jace has nothing to prove on this earth. He's already garaunteed himself a spot in Heaven. And who doesn't want that for their kids?! Frank and I always say that everyone needs a child with autism because you are quickly humbled from the ideal life. I did not add this blog for a pitty party. It's just been one-of-those-days and I needed to vent. Thanks:-)